You want more?

I would start off with a question, but I think I already know the answer. Everyone always wants more. Whether it’s wanting more chicken in your chicken bowl from Chipotle, money to spend at Victoria’s Secret because it’s the 7 for $27 sale, something on your car that is new to you but you must add more to make it even better than it already is, time, money, no matter what we all want more. If you say you don’t, you’re lying to yourself.

I’m guilty of this and I’ll admit it to everyone. Most of the things I catch myself saying I want more of is money, time and #relationshipgoals. That hashtag is really annoying, I know, but there’s no other way I could think of to put, which as I’m writing this is pretty sad. For those of you thinking this post is going to turn into a mushy post, it’s not going to but it will be about my relationship. If while reading the first paragraph, you thought this applied to you and then you read the beginning of the second paragraph and thought to yourself, “I love the #relationshipgoals” on Twitter, Instagram, Buzzfeed”… or wherever you’ve seen it, I suggest you continue to read this post.

After I asked what Huck thought of my last blog post and he responded with “I thought it was good! Are you going to write one about me?” I joking answered, “If you give me a reason to write about you.” Since then, it’s been on my mind.

In just under three years, Huck has been my person. He’s listened to me complain about the petty things, been a shoulder to cry on, given me advice, listened to me rant about anything and everything, seen me at my best, seen me at my worst, sacrificed for me, bought me practically whatever I’ve asked for (realistically of course, still waitin’ on that puppy), brought me a milkshake when I “just really have to have one now”, stayed up with me when my stomach hurts or just simply can’t fall asleep, and much more. I’m not discrediting my family and friends that I’ve had for 5, 10, or even 20 years that have also done a lot of these things, but I’ll be honest, this type of relationship is just different. After reading that, most would say, “you have it all”, “what more could you want?” That’s the point I’m trying to make and also show my appreciation in the least mushy way, because if you know Huck, mushy isn’t his thing.

There have been plenty of times that I say, “why don’t you take me out to dinner more,” “why don’t we go more places together,” “we never go to the movies,” “I know it’s expensive but could I please get this for Christmas/birthday”. I see the #relationshipgoals, the pictures of other couples on Instagram and Facebook, Buzzfeed posts and of course the pins on Pinterest. I’ve “called Huck out” before on the things I want or should get or what he should be doing many times, and I put that in quotes because I’m not really calling him out on anything because he gives me more than I’ll probably ever realize. Everything I listed in the third paragraph is more than I deserve. He’s stuck with me through it all, not because he has to but because he wants to. I’m not saying he wants to hear me complain or cry over petty things or put my education in front of his free time (like when I really need that good grade on my marketing test and he would rather do anything besides help me study), or text me (guys hate to text), or spend their last $3 dollars in cash on my club bake-sale after walking me to said bake-sale. What I’m saying is he loves me more than anyone (besides my family, because their love is the strongest).

A man who can put your wants, needs, and dreams in front of their own, or care about them as much as theirs, is someone who is doing more than any movie, dinner, gift, or ice cream could ever do.  A man who has his own responsibilities, life, schoolwork, plans, dreams, friends and wants that puts most of those second because he constantly wants to make sure you are happy is someone to hold on to and to never be unappreciated. I’m writing this and acknowledging my “wrong doing” and trust me, I’m not trying to make anyone feel bad or like they owe their significant other anything, because let’s be honest, I’m still going to slip and say or think I want more.

I just want to thank you, Huck. Even though I ask for more, hint at what other relationships are doing, or think you aren’t doing enough, you are. Don’t take me seriously when I slip up and ask for more. We will never be even; relationships aren’t about being even. They are about being appreciative and loving one another no matter what. I couldn’t be more thankful for someone who not only supports me but also encourages me and make me feel like I’m his world. You’ve helped shape me in the last few years and taught me a lot (even if some of it will never pertain to me ;)).

I could write forever, but I won’t. This isn’t all about me, or my relationship with Huck, it’s about being grateful for what you have and who you have. Take a moment to think of what you have and who you have and what they do for you, parents, family, friends, significant others, strangers, teachers and more. I’m sure after you think about it, you won’t ask for more, at least for a little while.

“In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

1 Thessalonians 5:18

Growing Up

This post is both easy and hard to write. It’s easy because it all comes so natural to me and is so real. But let me tell you, it’s also very hard because as I write I realize that even though some days I still feel like a little girl or I’m not sure when homemade salsa goes bad or if possibly living alone my senior year is a great idea or just a terrible thought out plan, that I am in fact growing up. My parents tell me all the time that I’m still learning, I’m growing up, I CAN figure things out on my own and most importantly things will work out.

I know how old I am, I’m 20. I haven’t been a teenager for roughly 4 months. I am the youngest of my friends. Everyone perceives 13, 18, 21, 30, and 40 the big birthdays. You’re finally a teenager, you can buy a lottery ticket, you can buy and drink alcohol legally, you’re really a grownup now, and finally you’re “middle aged” (a scary term apparently). My boyfriend turned 21 two weeks before I turned 20, a month later one of my best friends turned 21. On October 11^th, one of my friends I’ve known since I was 5 will turn 21 and after that a friend of mine that’s been my friend since we were in the nursery will turn 21 in December, a few days after Christmas. The First one to turn this crazy age didn’t seem to astonish me as much but now that there are so many happening so quickly, it’s kind of weirding me out to be honest. We are all actually growing up really fast. A friendship of 21 years, who else can say that? I’m proud I can.

This post isn’t just about age; it’s about how quickly time goes by. I have to have an internship before I graduate and I really wasn’t too worried about it until just the other day when I realized I only have one more summer before I graduate, now I’m on a time crunch. My mom was asking me about jobs and internships when I went home to visit. She mentioned going to a different state to intern with some different company and a different scenery, it sounded like a great idea until I realized this upcoming summer is the last summer I KNOW all of my friends will be in Richmond. After May, of 2017 that could all change. One my best friends already has a job offer when she graduates, that is just crazy to me. I forget I’m a junior sometimes, I guess I just think of myself as a college student with more work than the previous years. I am over halfway through my college experience and then I will begin the real world.

Life goes fast my friends. It’s exciting and scary and thrilling all at the same time. Birthdays may not be a huge deal, but they represent age and sometimes they represent how long you’ve known someone. Take a moment to think about that. Life is precious, fast, exciting, scary, and stressful and any other adjective you can think of. Enjoy it.

“I said, Days should speak, and multitude of year should teach wisdom.” Job 32:7