Give Thanks

Give thanks today. That’s what we’ve been told our whole lives; give thanks on Thanksgiving. A teacher of mine brought up an excellent point in class the week before we came home for Thanksgiving break. She said, “Why is there one day dictated by the government to give thanks?” I never thought about it that way until she brought it up. It is true that I see more people giving thanks and showing appreciation to people and things that they have on this day. Some may show their appreciation throughout the year but a lot won’t, because people don’t think about it. Every day we should be appreciative of what we have and thank those who make it all possible to have what we have.

With that being said, I am very thankful for everything I have. Over the last year so much has happened to people in my life and others around me making me notice that I have so much to be grateful for. I’m guilty of not always thanking people or telling other’s I’m grateful or appreciating what I have. I am grateful for the family I have, the University I attend, the job I have (thanks to an extremely giving and loving family), the roof over my head, the food on my plate every day, the clothes on my body, the friends I have, and the boyfriend I have along with his loving family. We have so much to be grateful for every day, not just on this day.

This morning I watched a few videos of things that people did for others because it’s Thanksgiving. One of the videos was of the Fox News Squad going to a grocery store and buying Veterans’ groceries. The video was extremely touching and they were beyond grateful. Why can’t this stuff happen regularly? Veterans, homeless, underprivileged, everyone, deserves for these nice gestures to happen more often. Our mothers, fathers, grandparents, teachers, friends, significant others, and strangers deserve to hear our thanks and feel appreciated. It’s never too early to start a New Years resolution, mine is to give more thanks to everyone, not just on the holiday. 

Giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Father Jesus Christ. Ephesians 5:20

You want more?

I would start off with a question, but I think I already know the answer. Everyone always wants more. Whether it’s wanting more chicken in your chicken bowl from Chipotle, money to spend at Victoria’s Secret because it’s the 7 for $27 sale, something on your car that is new to you but you must add more to make it even better than it already is, time, money, no matter what we all want more. If you say you don’t, you’re lying to yourself.

I’m guilty of this and I’ll admit it to everyone. Most of the things I catch myself saying I want more of is money, time and #relationshipgoals. That hashtag is really annoying, I know, but there’s no other way I could think of to put, which as I’m writing this is pretty sad. For those of you thinking this post is going to turn into a mushy post, it’s not going to but it will be about my relationship. If while reading the first paragraph, you thought this applied to you and then you read the beginning of the second paragraph and thought to yourself, “I love the #relationshipgoals” on Twitter, Instagram, Buzzfeed”… or wherever you’ve seen it, I suggest you continue to read this post.

After I asked what Huck thought of my last blog post and he responded with “I thought it was good! Are you going to write one about me?” I joking answered, “If you give me a reason to write about you.” Since then, it’s been on my mind.

In just under three years, Huck has been my person. He’s listened to me complain about the petty things, been a shoulder to cry on, given me advice, listened to me rant about anything and everything, seen me at my best, seen me at my worst, sacrificed for me, bought me practically whatever I’ve asked for (realistically of course, still waitin’ on that puppy), brought me a milkshake when I “just really have to have one now”, stayed up with me when my stomach hurts or just simply can’t fall asleep, and much more. I’m not discrediting my family and friends that I’ve had for 5, 10, or even 20 years that have also done a lot of these things, but I’ll be honest, this type of relationship is just different. After reading that, most would say, “you have it all”, “what more could you want?” That’s the point I’m trying to make and also show my appreciation in the least mushy way, because if you know Huck, mushy isn’t his thing.

There have been plenty of times that I say, “why don’t you take me out to dinner more,” “why don’t we go more places together,” “we never go to the movies,” “I know it’s expensive but could I please get this for Christmas/birthday”. I see the #relationshipgoals, the pictures of other couples on Instagram and Facebook, Buzzfeed posts and of course the pins on Pinterest. I’ve “called Huck out” before on the things I want or should get or what he should be doing many times, and I put that in quotes because I’m not really calling him out on anything because he gives me more than I’ll probably ever realize. Everything I listed in the third paragraph is more than I deserve. He’s stuck with me through it all, not because he has to but because he wants to. I’m not saying he wants to hear me complain or cry over petty things or put my education in front of his free time (like when I really need that good grade on my marketing test and he would rather do anything besides help me study), or text me (guys hate to text), or spend their last $3 dollars in cash on my club bake-sale after walking me to said bake-sale. What I’m saying is he loves me more than anyone (besides my family, because their love is the strongest).

A man who can put your wants, needs, and dreams in front of their own, or care about them as much as theirs, is someone who is doing more than any movie, dinner, gift, or ice cream could ever do.  A man who has his own responsibilities, life, schoolwork, plans, dreams, friends and wants that puts most of those second because he constantly wants to make sure you are happy is someone to hold on to and to never be unappreciated. I’m writing this and acknowledging my “wrong doing” and trust me, I’m not trying to make anyone feel bad or like they owe their significant other anything, because let’s be honest, I’m still going to slip and say or think I want more.

I just want to thank you, Huck. Even though I ask for more, hint at what other relationships are doing, or think you aren’t doing enough, you are. Don’t take me seriously when I slip up and ask for more. We will never be even; relationships aren’t about being even. They are about being appreciative and loving one another no matter what. I couldn’t be more thankful for someone who not only supports me but also encourages me and make me feel like I’m his world. You’ve helped shape me in the last few years and taught me a lot (even if some of it will never pertain to me ;)).

I could write forever, but I won’t. This isn’t all about me, or my relationship with Huck, it’s about being grateful for what you have and who you have. Take a moment to think of what you have and who you have and what they do for you, parents, family, friends, significant others, strangers, teachers and more. I’m sure after you think about it, you won’t ask for more, at least for a little while.

“In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

1 Thessalonians 5:18

Growing Up

This post is both easy and hard to write. It’s easy because it all comes so natural to me and is so real. But let me tell you, it’s also very hard because as I write I realize that even though some days I still feel like a little girl or I’m not sure when homemade salsa goes bad or if possibly living alone my senior year is a great idea or just a terrible thought out plan, that I am in fact growing up. My parents tell me all the time that I’m still learning, I’m growing up, I CAN figure things out on my own and most importantly things will work out.

I know how old I am, I’m 20. I haven’t been a teenager for roughly 4 months. I am the youngest of my friends. Everyone perceives 13, 18, 21, 30, and 40 the big birthdays. You’re finally a teenager, you can buy a lottery ticket, you can buy and drink alcohol legally, you’re really a grownup now, and finally you’re “middle aged” (a scary term apparently). My boyfriend turned 21 two weeks before I turned 20, a month later one of my best friends turned 21. On October 11^th, one of my friends I’ve known since I was 5 will turn 21 and after that a friend of mine that’s been my friend since we were in the nursery will turn 21 in December, a few days after Christmas. The First one to turn this crazy age didn’t seem to astonish me as much but now that there are so many happening so quickly, it’s kind of weirding me out to be honest. We are all actually growing up really fast. A friendship of 21 years, who else can say that? I’m proud I can.

This post isn’t just about age; it’s about how quickly time goes by. I have to have an internship before I graduate and I really wasn’t too worried about it until just the other day when I realized I only have one more summer before I graduate, now I’m on a time crunch. My mom was asking me about jobs and internships when I went home to visit. She mentioned going to a different state to intern with some different company and a different scenery, it sounded like a great idea until I realized this upcoming summer is the last summer I KNOW all of my friends will be in Richmond. After May, of 2017 that could all change. One my best friends already has a job offer when she graduates, that is just crazy to me. I forget I’m a junior sometimes, I guess I just think of myself as a college student with more work than the previous years. I am over halfway through my college experience and then I will begin the real world.

Life goes fast my friends. It’s exciting and scary and thrilling all at the same time. Birthdays may not be a huge deal, but they represent age and sometimes they represent how long you’ve known someone. Take a moment to think about that. Life is precious, fast, exciting, scary, and stressful and any other adjective you can think of. Enjoy it.

“I said, Days should speak, and multitude of year should teach wisdom.” Job 32:7

Is Sunday the beginning or end of the week?

                                                                      

Is it the beginning or the end of the week? Some people may argue that Sunday is the start of a new week; others may say it’s the end. Well today I have decided it’s the end, which may only be because I promised two blog posts this week so I’m considering this the same week.

This post is about what I did this summer. I was a nanny for a family I have been babysitting for since my senior year in high school. I know most people are probably thinking, “why is this post going to be important” or “most girls nanny at least once in their lifetime.” Well this is different. My dad actually introduced this family to me, he knew the father from when he was in a praise and worship band. When I started caring for their, at the time, two kids, I would just come over for a few hours at night to let their parents have a date night every once and while. Towards the end of the school year their mom, Kristin, asked me if I would be interested in a summer job that would be a few hours a day, a couple days a week. Saying yes that summer was the best thing I chose to do!

                             

I learned a lot from these two little kids. I know, it sounds weird, I learned a lot from two children who at the time were 4 and 2 and a half, but I did! These two kids could make me laugh when my day seemed way longer than any other day, have more patience, have a more protective side, and just learning how to deal with different situations.  

 I may have started with just the two of them but the summer before my freshman year at college, Ella, the oldest, told me she was going to be another big sister. Every time people ask me, “How many kids do they have?” every time I excitedly answer, “They have 3!!” Every time that question is followed with, “oh wow and what are the ages?” And again, I excitedly respond with “6, 4 and roughly 1 and half!” Most people follow that answer up with, “how do you do that”, “you must be brave”, “I assume you’ve known them for a while and feel obligated”. I may be “brave” or “crazy” but I wouldn’t change it for anything. I have personally known them for about 3 years (I think), I’ve honestly lost track. All I know is those 3 years have been the best summer!                     

               

I already said I’ve learned a lot from the kids, but I have also learned a lot from their mother. She is not only a mother of three, a wife to their daddy, but also an extremely hard working businesswoman. Kristin is a photographer, weddings, engagement sessions, family portraits, family, children, anything and she will capture the moment beautiful with not just her camera but her words as well. My favorite thing she does is her Hope series. She meets a family and captures their life and the challenges they may be going through. She has her own family she has to worry about and care for and then she adds more to it. Her blog is beautifully written, can be a tearjerker and have stunning photos with it.

 

Kristin has taught me so much about patience, hard work ethic, creativity, finding the funny in things that probably aren’t so funny (#whymiloscrying), balancing fun and education when it comes to school work and so much more! Sometimes I wonder if I stick through the crying of Ollie, ignoring from Milo and attitude from Ella just so I can talk to Kristin that day about whatever is going on or advice I need. When I wonder this, I think how lucky I am to have such a rewarding job every summer.

Now I can’t forget about their dad. I don’t get as much time to talk to him but one thing I can know for sure even if I never met him is that he is so loved, a wonderful father and an extremely supportive husband. Before I even started working for the Seward’s my dad always spoke highly of Jake. I am always raving about how cute their family is, or how adorable a picture of the 3 children being crazy is, or just squealing of how the Christmas card was the best one yet.

  I may leave their house at the end of the day exhausted, one kid may have cried pretty much the whole day, it could be raining the whole 15 minute commute home (this happened quite a lot), but I love every day there. It may just be a nanny job to some people, but for me it’s a rewarding job with so many lessons learned and taught.

Way Overdue

This post is way overdue, like a month overdue.  I have been busy; working, planning, vacationing, relaxing, so I guess that’s a little bit of an excuse. Truth is, I’ve been lazy, and my computer has been running extremely slow, which was also my fault since it had about 4 different programs that needed to be updated. On the plus side, there will be two posts this week! This post is about the awesome experience I had about a month ago helping a friend of a friend with a wedding! Some of you may have heard of her, others who haven’t really need to check her out because she is awesome at what she does! Her name is Kat and she is a wedding planner plus so much more. Her website is dearsweetheartevents.com, on her website you can see she is not just a wedding planner but also the creator and educator of so much more! I met her through Katelyn Alsop, a wedding photographer (you should also check her out).

Meeting Katelyn about 5 years ago was one of the best things that happened to me in my high school career and then having her tell me about Kat got me even more excited. I emailed with Kat back and forth for a few months until we finally met face to face, which also happened to be the day of the wedding I was assisting her with. When I met Kat outside her brand new (adorable) house I instantly was so excited! I drove two hours to meet with her and then she and I had about two hours together in the car driving to our destination. I learned so much about her and she gave me some amazing advice about starting my future business. The experience I had with her was so eye opening and taught me a lot. Kat was extremely organized, she got everything done in a timely fashion but still made it fun and a learning experience at the same time!

That weekend with Kat and assisting her was one of the highlights of the summer. I learned how to organize stuff specifically for planning a wedding, I learned punctuality, how to please people at the event while getting what needs to be done, done, and what little details go into an event that aren’t always thought of when thinking about planning a wedding. I fully enjoyed my experience and would do it again in a heartbeat.

Only God Can Judge Us

Based on the title, I’m sure everyone is a little hesitant to read, but don’t be! I am not writing to say who is right or wrong, what is justified and what is not, what makes someone a Christian and what deems them as a disgrace to Christianity and lastly, what makes a person “good” or “bad”. That is not for me to decide, nor any other person reading this. Society seems to think they know how to classify people pretty well in these last few weeks.

If you haven’t been living under a rock for the last few weeks then I’m sure you know what’s been going on in our country involving marriage equality, the notion to ban the Confederate Flag, and more recently the shooting of Marines in Chattanooga and the attack on Planned Parenthood services. My newsfeed has been filled with all of it, we are almost forced to read something almost daily about what is in the news, regardless of whether we want to read it or not. We don’t just see the articles posted and shared by friends but we also see the occasional belief or opinion of a friend when the news is shared. I haven’t shared an opinion or belief on any matter publicly. Do I have opinions and belief on each and every topic? Absolutely. Do I stand up for what I believe in with a full heart? Of course. Everyone has a right to their own opinion and the right to a freedom of speech.  Friends, acquaintances, strangers, they all have the right to post whatever they believe wherever they want to be heard and I have no issue with that. What I have an issue with is people being hateful, rude and out of line.

We are all God’s children. Some people think that is one of the biggest clichés, whether you are a Christian or not, we are all human. No single person can justify what is right or wrong. If this is a Christianity call, and telling someone they are less Christian for their beliefs that alone makes you less Christian for deciding that. Only God can judge us. I enjoy seeing people post, learning more, and learning more about a person based on how they feel towards the situation. I believe that everyone can have an opinion. I believe that those opinions and beliefs should be shared however they want. I believe that people should be able to talk to one another and learn from each other. I DON’T believe that we, as a society, as individuals, as equal humans should be the one to decide whether it’s right or wrong, justified or not, Christian or not, and good or bad.

It makes me sad to see what some are saying to others based off their beliefs and opinions. We all get a little heated at times and don’t think before we speak, or in most cases, type. Remember the people you are responding to are typically people you have a relationship with, don’t ruin that relationship by something typed in the heat of the moment. I think we all need to take a moment to pray and ask for guidance, acceptance towards others and a clean heart.

As my mom and dad always say, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

“There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you—who are you to judge your neighbor?” James 4:12

“A man who is kind benefits himself, but a cruel man hurts himself.” Proverbs 11:17

20 Years and The Relationships That Come With Them

I turned 20 yesterday. The common question is, “so do you feel any older?” I never do. I can say something about the way I feel though, I’ve learned a lot and realized that the older you get the more important the relationships you have are. I have also learned that the friends I have now mean more to me than anything. Some I have known for a few months, others a few years and one even since I was a baby. These people have been my ride or die for as long as I can remember.

My family is always there as well. I have truly been blessed having my parents and brother in one home, happy and healthy. My extended family has grown, cousins have graduated college, gotten married, and moved away, and I don’t see them as much as I’d like but I know they are always there. Family and friends are the most important people you can have in your life, and after 20 years my opinion of that has never shifted. I have my friends, family and an amazing boyfriend who I have been lucky enough to get to know not just him but his family as well. I’ve been extremely blessed to get close with his family as well; they share an outpouring of love to everyone around them and really know how to make me feel accepted and comfortable around them.  With that being said, I have also learned that things really do happen for a reason.

For a while I had a really hard time accepting things that happen in life, whether they are bad or good. Within the last month or so I have come to realize that everything is in God’s hands and anything that happens, happens for a reason. I’ve been trying to see the good in everything and try to make sense of everything that happens in my life. Everyone should try it; I promise it’ll make you happier!

“It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man.” Psalm 118:8

Why Write?

This one has been a long time coming. Some people have asked me why I started a blog, what is it for, and some have just assumed things…whether they were right or not. I’ll answer the big question in this post.

            I started writing because after talking to roughly 10 people who are either involved in the wedding industry, started their own business or both, all told me to start blogging! Over the last year I have been trying to make more connections with people through social media and hoping to meet them in person to strengthen the connection. I have emailed countless business professionals, read so many blogs, looked at tons of websites and talked to some friends who are working their way to success and others who have definitely reached it. They have many things in common, but one that really stuck out was they all have told me to start blogging and they have a blog of their own as well!

            Since I haven’t really started what I want to do, for now I can write about what I’m striving towards, my life and what I’ve learned over the years. As I mentioned in my first post, I attend Radford University as a Communication major. I just finished year two of that journey about two weeks ago. It still hasn’t fully sunk in yet that it’s now summer and I have been in college for 2 years, which if all goes as planned, means I’m half way through this experience. I love where I am in school, I love my major, the people I’ve met, what I’ve learned so far and what I have to look forward to. Some things I’ve learned so far are; 1) people change, that’s a fact, not an opinion, 2) classes that I never excepted to enjoy, have been my favorite, 3) I have some of the best motivators and supports in the world, (that may be an opinion but I think it’s a fact), 4) the people I’ve met in college have taught me so much that I need to know for my future, and finally 5) I learned that I have to live to please myself, not other people.

            When I posted my first post I was extremely nervous, I actually waited a few days after writing it to even post it. After posting it, my closest friends, family, and boyfriend kept telling me how proud they were, how cool it was and that they loved what I wrote. Those words meant the world to me. I was so excited! I am still getting used to the schedule of the summer, which is why I haven’t written anything since my first post. I have been pet sitting for two weeks, nannying for a wonderful family that I’ve been with for years and went to a friend’s river house, so I’ve been a little busy. This post isn’t much, but it answers the question of why I started a blog and I look forward to writing more!

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your moths, but only what is useful for building others up according to their needs, that is may benefit those who listen."  Ephesians 4:29

Respect.

Bare with me, this is a long post, but it’s my 2^nd post so it’s worth the read (in my opinion). Respect. It’s a big thing, always has been and always will be. My generation, meaning those born in generation Y or those born between the 1980s to now are the ones who should be focusing on respect the most. Why, you may ask? Well to start, most people born in that time period have finished their education up to 12^th grade and a majority continued school past that onto college or some type of advanced degree. This may not sound like it has anything to do with respect but it does, because not only is it more competitive to get a job because of the economy and the fewer jobs available but it also makes it harder because opposed to the generations before us, most people have a degree past high school. Having the higher education is extremely beneficial nowadays but it also makes the competition for jobs even greater. So the next attribute needed aside from the higher education, are credible characteristics, such as respect, punctuality, determination and many more.

Now that we’ve gotten past the boring facts and statistics I can talk about the importance of respect no matter what age you are, your idea of how high up you are in status, your intellectualism and whether you think you should be respecting everyone or not.

To get respect, you have to give respect. They go hand in hand, most people are taught this at a very young age. What’s shocking to me is that being almost 20 years old, I have seen people go from having very little respect at a young age (they’re still learning) to high school, specifically years closer to graduation into college losing that respect that had for just a few short years. I’ve seen relationships suffer, friendships end, families drift and jobs fail because of the lack of respect. I don’t have an answer or even a thought that could completely make sense to me on why this happens. All I know for sure, is it does, and I’ve seen it. I’ve seen the deterioration of respect from people I have known for a short time and people I have known for years.

As a child I know I didn’t fully understand it, but one thing I thought was, “this is hard.” I didn’t want to listen to my parents when I had a rebuttal, or obey them when they told me I had to do something that I didn’t want to do, but just as most children, after repercussions I realized maybe I should listen and respect them. I learned at a young age that I wasn’t going to get very far without respecting others. Which is true for everyone, you will not go far if you don’t respect others. This is probably the biggest lesson I learned as a kid and it stuck with me, obviously.

Respect has a lot to do with communication. For those of you have don’t know, I’m a Communication major with a focus in Public Relations at Radford University. I want to be a wedding planner and as many people know, especially my wedding industry workers know, communication is key. Respect can be heavily gained or lost based off of a person’s communication skills, which is why I am so focused on this topic. Everyone, especially those coming close to graduating college and preparing to enter into the work force should be focusing on respect, even if it’s one of the only things they do. Point is, respect others and you, too will gain respect.

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” Philippians 2:31

Systems Theory within Wedding Planning

When you think about interviewing someone, you don’t think it’s going to land you a job somewhere. Typically the system is reversed, someone interviews you to give you a job. In my case, I was the interviewer and the interviewee gave me a job opportunity. I interviewed a friend of mine named Kaitlyn Phipps who is a leader on Radford University’s campus and an up and coming wedding photographer. Kaitlyn and I met at a wedding last year. She was taking pictures and I was running around doing odd jobs for the wedding planner. Some people will just assume that we met because we were doing similar things or “working together”, but they’re wrong. Kaitlyn recognized me from my senior pictures that she saw on Katelyn James’ blog; funny how two, or essentially 3 worlds can collide so easily!

When I interviewed Kaitlyn, my questions focused on the System’s Theory. I asked her basic questions, such as “What do you do on a typical day”, “what’s the most satisfying things about working in the wedding industry and the most challenging”, and “what types of jobs did you do before starting your own?” The questions I really focused on that incorporated Systems Theory, were “how does your business value and use communication”, “what subsystems are within your business”, and lastly I asked her if she knew of anyone that I could talk to and connect with who could give me advice and help towards my future.

Kaitlyn gave me very detailed responses to all of my questions, which allowed us to have a great conversation that also gave me more insight. Kaitlyn really values communication within her business. It is the most important aspect of her business and she uses it mostly with her husband who helps her immensely. She also uses it with other people she encounters while doing the job she loves. She said that each time is different when it comes to how many people are working with her. Each wedding is different and has a different amount of people you have to communicate with but on average, the communication is good. Kaitlyn also included that when the communication is bad, whether it’s between her and the vendors, bride, renters, ext., it makes her job a lot harder. The subsystems she uses are all of the people who make up her business. To be more specific, this could be the person she rents camera equipment from, the bride and groom, wedding party, vendors, wedding planner if there is one, and anyone else she encounters during the days leading up to or day of the wedding.

My last question for her was if she knew of anyone I could connect with. I loved her answer, “most likely!” She has so many networks and was leaving in a few days for a conference where she would meet new people. After the interview, I realized that I learned so much more than I expected to! She offered me two opportunities for the summer that would not only help her, but help me as well.